"But it's SO obvious!" – and other lies we tell ourselves

What's obvious to you makes no sense to everyone else

I'll never forget the moment. After weeks of building, tweaking, and perfecting my product, I was finally ready to show it to a friend – someone I knew was in my exact target audience. Smart person. Would get what I built instantly. Or at least, that's what I told myself.

Reality? It took me forever to get her to understand what the hell I was building.

And no, it wasn't because she was dumb. Quite the opposite – she's incredibly smart. The problem was me. I had lived with this product in my head for so long that I assumed the value was self-evident. Value proposition? Obvious! Why do things this way? Logical! How to use the service optimally? Pshh, crystal clear!

Spoiler alert: It wasn't crystal clear.

The Curse of Knowledge – when you know too much

There's a concept in psychology called "The Curse of Knowledge." Once you know something, it becomes almost impossible to imagine what it was like to not know it. This is why teachers struggle to explain basic concepts, and why people who build products often create completely useless onboarding.

You've spent hundreds of hours thinking through every tiny aspect of your product. Every feature has a reason. Every design choice is deliberate. But your user? They just opened your app for the first time while sitting on the toilet scrolling through their phone.

They've given you maybe 30 seconds to prove this is worth their time.

Onboarding isn't "nice to have" – it's your only weapon

Here's the brutal truth: It doesn't matter how good your product is if people don't understand it fast enough to reach that magical "aha!" moment.

Good onboarding is the difference between:

• ✅ "Holy shit, this solves exactly my problem!"
• ❌ "Uhh... I don't really get the point. *deletes app*"

Think of it like dropping someone into the middle of a movie without any context. You could have the most brilliant plot in the world, but if they don't know who the characters are, what's at stake, or why they should care – they're going to walk out.

"Hold the user's hand" sounds condescending. It's not.

When I say you need to "hold the user's hand" through the first interactions, I don't mean treat people like idiots. I mean be a thoughtful guide.

The best onboarding experiences I've had:

• Show, don't tell: Don't explain the feature, let me use it with training wheels on
• Give quick wins: Let me feel like I got something out of this within 2 minutes
• Contextual help: Don't dump everything on me at once, show me things when they're actually relevant
• Personalization: Ask what I want to achieve, don't show me everything you can do

Examples of brilliant vs. tragic onboarding

Brilliant: Duolingo

• Starts by letting you actually learn something within 30 seconds
• Builds up complexity gradually
• Celebrates small victories with fun animations
• You feel like you can speak Spanish after 5 minutes (even though you only know "el gato")

Tragic: Many B2B SaaS products

• 47 slides explaining features you don't understand the need for yet
• "Take a tour!" that takes 15 minutes and doesn't let you actually do anything
• Dumps you into an empty dashboard and says "good luck lol"

My onboarding checklist (after many fails)

Here's what I've learned you must have:

The uncomfortable truth

You know what's the hardest thing about creating good onboarding? It's realizing that your product is not intuitive. It feels like a personal failure. But it's not.

Complexity is often a sign of power. But power without guidance is just confusing.

Takeaway (TL;DR for those who scrolled here)

• Your product isn't self-explanatory (sorry)
• People aren't dumb, they just haven't lived in your head for the past few months
• Good onboarding = the difference between success and "meh, whatever"
• Test your onboarding on someone who HASN'T heard you talk about the product for hours
• Hold the user's hand, but in a cool way
• Show value fast, explain the rest later

Next time someone doesn't "get" your product right away? It's not them. It's your onboarding. And that's actually good news – because onboarding can be fixed.

Now I'm going to tweak my onboarding. Again. For the sixth time. Wish me luck. 🚀